'Top Chef' Episode 8: Everybody wins!

Let's just get this out of the way: Nobody went home on last night's episode of 'Top Chef.' That's right. Padma didn't ask anybody to pack their knives and go, and next week is going to be one big do-over. There. It's done. Sorry if we just ruined it for all of you TiVoers out there, but there's really no reason anyone should go through the suspense poor Dale had to go through only to find out it's all for nothing.

While we think the ending was a cop out (hmm ... perhaps because Howie was the obvious choice for knife-packing, with his awful, gummy risotto, but, of course, you can't very well send The Villain home when the season's barely halfway over ... ) the episode did have some season highs.

Here's one: Daniel Boulud as guest judge. Boulud clearly impresses the chefs more than any other guest judge this season. Even Hung is humbled. But Dale, whose sound bites are really starting to grow on us (and the producers, apparently) sums it up better than anyone: "Holy sh*t, it's Daniel Boulud."

While Boulud looks on, the chefs are told they'll have 30 minutes to come up with a gourmet burger. It's the first Quickfire Challenge we've seen in awhile that really forces the chefs to cook, and it's appropriate that Boulud will judge a challenge focusing on gourmet burgers. This is going to be good.

But when the chefs are presented with menus from Red Robin, our hearts sink. For those unfamiliar with this restaurant chain (and if you don't live in Schaumburg, Warrenville, Rockford, Lincolnshire or about a half-dozen other far-flung locales, it's entirely possible that you are) it's a "gourmet burger" establishment. How gourmet? Well, it places a grilled turkey burger in a section of the menu tagged "adventuresome." It's $8.29. And that same menu also features a starter called a Just-in-Quesadilla. Seriously.

The chefs feign interest as the Red Robin menu gets passed around, but it's hard to believe that Daniel Boulud isn't horrified, or at least wondering what the heck he's gotten himself into. Fortunately, it turns out that the whole Red Robin thinh is just wildly gratuitous product placement-yes, more gratuitous than Glad or Toyota or even Coldstone-and it's over quickly. Whew.

But then, in another odd turn of events, it suddenly seems like everyone is making a shrimp burger. Thankfully, we see Dale frying an egg. It's a good move. He uses it to top a burger of ground, seared tuna, with asparagus, onion, mustard and soy, which he serves with a mirin and soy aioli. It gets a nod from Daniel.

Dale also gets props from Daniel for his bread choice, but Tall CJ ends up winning the Quickfire. Tall CJ doesn't get immunity, but he does get to choose his team for Elimination Challenge. And Dale's not on it. Uh oh.

Dale gets stuck with Sara, Howie and Hung-a disaster waiting to happen, if there ever was one. But what actually does happen is more or less irrelevant, since this turns out to be the episode in which, as we already know, everybody wins.

Here's the abbreviated version: The teams have 24 hours to open a restaurant. Dale assumes front-of-house duties for his team. He shops. He decorates. He says this: "Queer Eye's got nothing on my ass!" (Oooh! Look out, Ted Allen! Dale's comin' for you!) He buys vanilla-scented candles. Ted Allen does not like the vanilla-scented candles. (Take that, Dale!) At some point, Daniel Boulud uses the word "yummy." And next week, we'll do it all over again.

But until then, we're probably going to feel a little empty inside. Because, though we didn't realize it until last night, we sort of look forward to Padma asking someone to pack his knives are go every week. Maybe that's mean-spirited of us. But really, isn't that what reality TV is all about? Winners, losers, the epic struggle of it all? We sure think so ... right up until our favorite contestant gets booted, that is ...